I am Jane and I'm Lazy Lazy LAZY!!!

It's really nothing new that my mum favours my brother much more than me. For instance, why is it that she only sees the trouble I create but not the solutions I come up with? And why doesn't she see the problems external factors (such as JPA, I cannot resist condemning them, I really don't know why) have caused my brother who sits there and sings "Let it be, let it be, let it be" which will ALWAYS end up with my mum jumping up and down, and eventually solving the problem for him (which sometimes involves ME solving the problem for HIM). And believe it or not, he is still the blue-eyed boy and I the problem-maker. On the way back to KL, I finally figured it out:

• My mum has a short-attention span, meaning to say that only the first foremost events matter to her, the rest are, as they say, HISTORY (ironic, isn't it?)
• Thus, the reason for my being the problem-maker is that I'm always itchy to try new things, take high risks, and obviously sometimes TOO MUCH of risk, hence the problem.
• My bro, on the other hand, just sits and waits for the sky and everything else to fall onto his lap. This, of course is with the exception of his computer games.
• Because I always get myself into trouble and really despise my mum's nagging, I always TROUBLESHOOT (that's why I'm so good at it now), and solve my problems. I very proudly announce that I haven't asked my mum for solutions for one and a half years, and counting- she is merely only updated on the recent outcomes and possibilities.
• Because my bro sits and waits for things to happen, the problems that he faces are NORMALLY brought in by external parties, and even though they are HIS problems, and they might affect HIS future, he still sits and plays DOTA with his friends, while singing "Don't worry, be happy"
• In the midst of all these, my mum will be jumping up and down, calling so-and-so, her blue-eyed boy still sitting and singing "Everything's gonna be alright"
• On the few occasions where I so happen to be home, I'd get pulled out of bed at 10am (well, at least she lets me sleep till ten NOWADAYS), pushed into the car, and driven all around Taiping to do HIS errands.
• All my mum can say is that he is not resourceful enough, not a word of thanks, but lots of words when it comes to nagging JUST because I ACCIDENTALLY fell asleep on the couch.
• Blue-eyed boy remains blue-eyed, and trouble-maker remains problematic.
  

I find self-satisfaction in knowing that I'd survive better than him. Hence, contradicting my beau's stand that I'm hard to please, I just have 'standards'.

What was meant to be short, became long. Sigh...
Anyway, this doctor, commented on my blog about my agonizing wisdom tooth, and I so happened to have read Nicole's blog, who recently had THREE wisdom teeth taken out at ONCE, (OUCH!) although she was lucky enough to have been put to sleep (not like dogs, of course) while the whole thing was done. And now, this is when problem-seeker will create problem. I blame (or rather, THANK) technology for the fast and wide spread of information.

Although the doctor/dentist's 'dental tourism' thinga-ma-jigga' sounded REALLY COOL, it'd be IMPOSSIBLE to have such an experience. Imagine the conversation:

Me : Dad (obviously dad is easier to convince than mum), there's this thing called dental tourism in India, and the doctor said that it was really 'PAINLESS' because they have better technology there.
Dad : WHAT?! Fly all the way to INDIA, just to extract ONE miserable tooth? Are you CRAZY???

Yes, I can imagine it now, although the conversation would be much longer and filled with racist remarks. Now, I shall work on getting my parents to find me a doctor who'd put me to sleep before jiggling his cold metal scalpel. At least all I'd have to endure is the jab. And yes, I'm afraid of jabs, no thanks to Pritam Singh.

On another note, I'm so freaking lazy! This is not the first time I've said this, but I've YET to touch my law book. On top of that, I have not FINISHED revising for Marcus' test (although I really doubt he'd give one, knowing him). Did I mention he repeats his jokes and testimonials?
That's beside the point. My point is, I really need a kick in the rear. And please don't offer to do so. Because I would have to courteously reject.

And so, for the umpteenth time, I solemnly vow to:

1. Finish my law text book, go through the questions, and pass it once (more like twice) and for all.
2. Brush up on my audit, since Marcus' voice really sticks into your head, and seeing him AGAIN for the SAME subject is going to be much more torturous than ever imagined
3. Stop falling asleep in Mr Goh's class (sad to say Goh doesn't have as much power as Marcus to keep me awake) and start revising.
4. Start reading articles (I honestly tell you I never knew they were 'interesting') and such
5. Stop being lazy, stop wasting time, stop downloading movies, stop flinging money up, down, left and right as if it's going out of fashion (actually I don't),stop sleeping late, stop eating junk food (I went one week merely on raw greens and I felt so much more ALIVE). and thus,
6. Start being hardworking, (I can't say start organizing my schedules, because I know they'll go all wrong anyway), start ROCK CLIMBING (anyone?), start exercising, start using my time PRODUCTIVELY, start sleeping and waking up early, start eating HEALTHILY.
7. Start doing what I say I will do. I cannot stress the importance of this one.

And so, I shall sleep now, and pray I wake up early to study the damn notes. This really isn't so long, compared to my previous posts.

I am Jane: Kleptocracy??

*I hereby pronounced that I am, an unsound person, and not to be believed, and thus, cannot be held liable.
Kleptocracy, also known as the democratization of authoritarianism (semi-authoritarianism).

"A young and unstable democracy struggling toward improvement and consolidation is usually not classified as a semi-authoritarian country. Rather, the term "semi-authoritarian" is reserved for stable regimes that combine democratic and authoritarian elements. Most of them are dominant-party systems - that is, states where opposition parties are allowed and free elections are held, but where the opposition has no real chance of winning. Sometimes the dominant party maintains power through election fraud, while other times the elections themselves are fair, but the electoral campaigns preceding them are not.

The late 1980s and early 1990s have seen the demise of many different kinds of authoritarian governments: communist states in Eastern Europe, right-wing military dictatorships in Latin America, and various others in Africa. Often, the governments that replaced them declared their allegiance to democracy and implemented genuine democratic reforms in the beginning, but eventually turned into semi-authoritarian regimes." (wikipedia.org)

Or rather, in our case, should it be authoritarianism of democracy?

"The first principle is that all members of the society have equal access to power and the second that all members enjoy universally recognised freedoms and liberties" (wikipedia.org, on principles of democracy)


Which fits the bill? You decide. How is it possible to have democracy, but not to be free? Ask us, we did it. Let me explain this in a simple way for you.

We have three glasses.

The first one, you're able to see through, clearly. The second one, you know there's something inside, but you don't really know what. The third one, I could tell you that the same toy is in the cup, and you may or may not believe me because you can't really see through.
The first one is transparent, the second one translucent, and the third one opaque. Transparent matters CAN turn opaque, under certain circumstances. It will reach a point where it is neither transparent nor opaque. You can see through it, but you really can't tell what you're seeing. It's almost like going blind. At one point, you just won't be able to see anything anymore.

Democratization of authoritarianism is just that. You can see through, but you can't really see what's going on. This seems to be the reverse here, literally speaking. People here don't bother covering up their acts these days. They either think we've all gone blind, or they have complete faith that their opaque little cup that they think no one can see inside. Question and be prepared to be slandered. Raise your hand and be called a traitor. Think and be called an extremist. That is the system. So, where shall we put our education to use? Maybe in the toilet, use your strength, to push out the shit, calculate how much strength you need for one shit to come out, time how long it takes for the shit to drop, and of course which kind of smoke with chemicals strong enough to mask the smell. Where else? I believe we're all miracle workers, living in democracy with no freedom. They'd laugh, but we tell them, we've done it. It's not impossible.
There is no politics in this.

Just today I was watching the 8pm news, and of course, the whole world has their eyes on Anwar's case now. The irony is the news that followed Anwar's was of Raja Petra. Funny how cases with opposite facts have the same side being arrested. Funny, what SOME say, to justify other's act. Funny, how other people have to justify other people's act when they aren't really involved. Funny, if I didn't know better, I would say it was the same war, fought in all different angles.

And of course, we have our parliamentary debates, still ongoing, still the same. Although Darwin's theory seems to have a reversing act here, with people jumping up and down, asking others who merely raised a hand to shut up, and of course, the ever-famous name calling. One can only wonder, if these name callings are really whom these people are. And of course, the mind boggling thought of why would a village of people be unhappy towards a resolution put forward in their favour? It's as if someone's giving you gold, and you're not only declining, but using it as rocks to throw back at the former.

They have this old saying "Hujan emas di negara orang, hujan batu di negara sendiri, baik lagi negara sendiri", I don't know why someone would make that up, but right now, I rather have the reverse. Why should I wait till it's too late? It's not like anyone's going to take care of our well-being, it's always been every man for himself. At least that's what I believe, and may I remind you that I am currently of an unsound mind. Although, it is understandable that if you've left your child in the care of someone else, your own flesh and blood, it's only natural that when you come back to get the child, the caretaker will hesitate, and at times, put up a fight. What can we do? In the bible, it says that God has created a new world, ready for those who believe in Him, He has created a new heaven and hell. This old world is only temporary. It will be destroyed (as if we're not destroying it already). Remember that we came into the world with nothing. We survived. And if we go out into the world with nothing, we will still survive. There's always a thing as starting over. But of course, if you've been pampered your whole life, generation after generation, your chances of surviving would be way lower.

Not my two-cents, but non-sense.

I am Jane: A pain above the neck, my jaw

I woke up today all 'psyched' to get my other wisdom tooth extracted. The other one came out naturally, so I was really praying that this one would too. I really don't know whether or not this is a blessing in disguise, or it's just my stupid luck, but Dr. Pritam Singh called in sick at 10am (I thought government servants start work at 8, 9 the most?) and so my appointment was cancelled. And after much 'convincing', I finally got dragged out of the house to Dr. Ng's clinic (he was the one who taught me all about impacted teeth) only to find that he wasn't in today. Nevermind him, I saw his partner Dr Lim, who rescheduled me for tomorrow, for SURGERY. Did I tell you that I was sitting beside a man who had his mouth violently jabbed and stitched before Dr Lim came over? I wanted to run out at that point. Don't even need to feel the needle, I can already imagine the pain right now. And the agony of knowing that someone is STITCHING your gums together. And so, I went across to Hospital Taiping only to find out that we have this new policy where some other doctor must refer you before you get to see the specialist (so, if a cancer patient walks in and says I need to see an oncologist, and you tell him to go see Dr. A who will only be free to see you next month, and after which Dr. A has to run some tests, and supposing nothing is screwed up, your test results are out, and he has to diagnose it and supposing that he comes up with the right diagnose in time, and finally writes you a letter to enable you to see Dr. B the oncologist, who, because he has so many patients and seminars to attend to is only free to see you one month later, who, again, runs some tests on you, and finally diagnose you with the last stage of cancer, (that is, if you haven't already died during the waiting process), and says that you will have to go for radiotherapy or what not to lengthen your already-shortened life due to all the waiting when they could have started therapy earlier. Seriously, having the spare cash to afford private medical bills is almost a necessity now. Why don't they subsidize that for us?
We used to complain about how long the queues are at the government hospitals, and being a 'good' minister, he finally appeased the people by promising shorter waiting periods. Whether or not our good minister came up with this idea, or it defers among hospitals, I don't know. What I do know is that the hospital has a new tactic called "Chase the patients away". It makes sense, of course, but it's so typically Malaysian. Twist and turn the words and make matters worse. We might as well set up a school for that, since our MPs have obviously mastered the skill and are now passing it down to government servants. I will give you examples.

1. The other day, I went over to Pokok Assam's Dental Clinic, and I casually asked if treatment was still free for pensioners' children. The guy replied me by saying, "Memang dari dulu ada polisi, tapi free untuk isteri pesara sahaja". Bloody hell, my bracers were FREE because my dad was a government servant/ pensioner/ somewhere in the midst of that. So how is it that you tell me the policy has not changed but is somewhat so very different? Please don't bullshit with me. If there's one thing I know how to do, it's COMPLAIN.
   
2. My bro needed to have his medical exams done in a government hospital, it was stated in BLACK AND WHITE, and even though my mum showed them the letter, the very clearly said "Kita tak ada masa, pergi klinik swasta". Stupid fella! Don't you know how to read? It's a REQUIREMENT to do it in a government hospital. We don't fancy waiting you know. It's not like we get any benefit from making you see another extra patient.
3. My mum wanted to fix an appointment for me so that I'd get to see the dentist when I finally come back to Taiping (yes, I'm THAT particular when it comes to pain. Bangsar clinics are all filled with young cikus whose heads are wrapped, with arms so skinny it looks like their arms would be detached instead of my tooth being extracted). They said that they weren't taking in new patients and that I'd have to go to a private dentist. The only reason I want to have it done in the hospital is because they have LASER equipment which will hopefully ease my pain. And since they're going to cause me physical pain although INDIRECTLY, I demand compensation!

Now, my family is of a middle-class income. Therefore, we HAVE the money if the need arises for painful events like these. But bear in mind that more than half of Malaysia still lives in poverty. And HALF of that half still aren't getting any kind of subsidies (unless election is coming)! So, please tell me what these people are supposed to do when they have tooth aches? Since it's your procedure to make us wait for AT LEAST a week, I think the poor kid would have probably banged his head on the wall to replace his toothache with a bigger headache. And let's just be frank, and emergency ward isn't really and 'emergency' ward because your emergencies get tended to way long after the emergency is no longer an emergency. I suggest you come in, pretend to faint, and then possibly give symptoms of which will look like you have a fatal disease just so you'll get a doctor's attention. If they quarantine you and so happen to forget about you, just touch somebody and start coughing. I'm sure they'll give you attention now. Same thing goes for the TMNet customer service hotline. Please tell me what is efficient in Malaysia. Wait, I just answered that. Our TAX collecting system, although I doubt it will hold any longer. Self-assessment? Shish, more like "We're giving you the freedom to give as much as you want", not that I'm complaining.

And so, wish me luck for tomorrow, and pray that my literal pain will be lifted. I still haven't mustered the guts to do it yet, actually.

I am Jane after a successful weekend

I really am considering changing my URL to cheonghei.blogspot.com (any comments? hehe..). At this very second, MSN has decided to finally WORK, after so many days of NOT working, just a random thought.

Been hesitating whether or not to blog tonight, and finally gave in to temptation. The internet really has lost it's appeal. Gone are the days when I can sit for hours, downloading movie, surfing here and there, window(s) shopping (with an 's' because I use WindowsXP, get it? I know, very lame. Don't have to tell me.) Am currently thinking of learning up HTML. Does anybody know where I can do that?

How weird is it that when I'm sitting in the LRT, or in the car, or even TALKING to boring people, I get great ideas on what to blog, but when I finally sit in front of the laptop, all the ideas seem to elude, or worst still, I don't know which to choose. My thoughts are like running water, if you don't catch them fast enough, they just flow right pass you with a very slight possibly of catching it back later. Hence the saying, golden words are never uttered twice, more like golden thoughts and ideas.

With regards to the above title, my plan to NOT plan was very successful indeed, although the people involved were skeptical at first. We reached Melaka Sentral around 6pm, and were looking left and right, up and down for signs of Sean Kingston and the baboon.
The weird thing was when we tried calling them, BOTH didn't pick up (doesn't that sound fishy?), so I thought they were playing tricks on us. Anyway, on the way back to the car which the two fellows misplaced and forgot where they parked, the conversation went like this:

Hem : So what's the plan?
Gan : Ask the planner.
Jan : There is no plan.
Hem : What?! You came all the way here with no plan?
Dasa : Yeah! They never plan anything, only told me they were coming today, on Wednesday. Damn smart right?
Gan : Your plan was to come to Melaka. We're here. Mission accomplished. Let's go back now.
Jan : What to do, when I plan, people spoil my plan, so I have a new policy, that is to NOT plan
Everyone : -.-"

You see! If I plan, I get scolded, if I don't plan, I also get scolded. What to do?! But I guess the not-planning plan worked well. Something like free and easy, but not very free, or very easy.
First off, we went for food at Jonkers. Beau didn't get his chicken rice ball, but I got my 'ais kacang' and laksa. Since I tried the normal 'ais kacang' and laksa the last time, I decided to venture out, and had laksa baba and chendol sago. Honestly, I would have been happier with the originals. Oh, well. There's always next time (beau's going to kill himself when he sees that sentence). After which, I walked from one end of Jonkers to the other.
At one end, there was this open-air karaoke session, on a big stage in the middle of the street and some ang-mohs were singing that Titanic song which we've all heard one too many times. Further down were some very enthusiastic aunties line-dancing to Hari Krishna songs.
Can you imagine that?? Beau finally found his leather wristband for only RM10 which looked so much better than the one they sold at The Curve's flea market for three times the price, thus he was very fulfilled at that point itself.

Next off, we headed towards ALOHA where I was supposed to meet Mabel. Excuse me for not knowing that Malaccan clubs are empty even at 10.30pm. While Mabel and gang went to eat, beau, Dasa and I had a bucket of beer while the guys all feasted their eyes on this chic who was high enough to pole dance with a pillar.

After that, we hopped on over to Aloha for another bucket of beer (I seriously don't drink that much beer) where Mabel was with Putra, Krish and some Michael Jackson wannabe. I really wasn't high at all, but I guess Mabel was the ecstasy that night, and while we were going crazy, the guys were all satisfying themselves with the singers' exposed skin. Not that I was complaining, because I was hooked on this guy's feet!

Sadly, the clubbing ended, and I really needed a bath, so I went over to wherever Mabel was, and had a shower, as well as have some girl talk with her. Guys will never understand girl talk, and that's what makes it so special. And contrary to their believes, girl talk does not only consist of make up and fashion, especially when Mabel and I are concerned. We left Melaka after breakfast, and I ditched my mum because I seriously couldn't open my eyes anymore. Of course, mum wouldn't let me go and I had to go back in the afternoon to meet up with her. Sunil was going for his prom and so I was left to babysit Kaiser. Even though he was a mess and was really really demanding all of a sudden, I really couldn't be angry at him for more than 10 minutes, no matter how many times he peed. Strange enough, he was actually very good, considering the fact that he likes to pee and shit every where in Sunil's house. He only chose one spot to pee. Putting him to sleep was the difficult part. I was really tired and sleep-deprived but the fluffy boy was full of energy, and when he saw me sleeping, he'd start yapping. After a while, I put him on the bed beside me, but the little busybody would jump off every time he heard a door open, and expect me to carry him up. I had very little sleep the whole night. I woke up in the morning only to find his face in his own thick, concentrated, yellow, creamy pee, which was VERY disgusting. Didn't have time to clean up the place, was waiting for mum to come, but she took such a long time and I was getting hungry, so I went out with Sunil for lunch, and met his new girlfriend.
As we were talking, the six degrees of separation theory really seemed to be true, or rather, there was really less than six degrees of separation. I found out that his girlfriend knew some of my friends as well as beau's friend. This six degrees of separation thing has been happening very often recently. The other day, when we went to INTI to give Sunil his keys, I heard someone say "Hey" to the beau and I. We both replied at the same time, and I was confused to whom he was greeting. Apparently he knew the both of us, but we never knew that we knew the same guy! This is really freaky.
Mum came to pick me up, and we headed towards Putrajaya. On the way there, dad was like "You must be going out a lot to know all these places". I don't. I just know which highway is which, and I read signboards. Unlike some idiots who think they know it all, and I'm not going to hold back and mention that he's my uncle. I give him no face at all. He may be my uncle, but he has least of my respect for the lies, deceit and bumming around. Can you imagine he picked me up from Puduraya and I was supposed to go back to Sunway but he took some highway and we ended up in Balakong? Same thing happened today, and I really wanted my dad to experience the full effect of it, and so I kept quiet, since I was always to blame when we got lost. My mum was really pissed off too, and we both said that we'd keep quiet with the least contentment. Sure enough, the arrogant fellow was so arrogantly showing my dad what was left and right (which was SO obvious), that he missed a turning. While we were at the gas station, my mum told me that this trip is really pointless now, judging from the fact that he'd obviously take another highway tomorrow. That is when I noticed my mum and I have some things in common, if not a lot. For one, we both have egos bigger than our heads, and we hate people who leach of us, even if it is our siblings, and we both dislike my uncle for using my dad. Unfortunately, we're like magnets of the same pole. That's why we can't sit together and not argue, we both have our own set of principles, and although some may coincide, they are very much always different. And because we both stand by our principles and are unwilling to bend, we really almost never see eye to eye. I'm not saying I love or hate my mum, I'm just justifying our situation. In fact, I would say that my mum has taught me well, well enough to use what she's taught me against herself. Nowadays, whenever my mother starts nagging, all I have to say is "So you think you've raised such a daughter?" and the nagging stops. Because if she said yes, she'd be questioning her own parenting skills. I'm guessing at one point I'd take over my mother and she'd be the one in my shoes. Life is just like this weird perpetuating cycle, isn't it?
Lately I've been having these weird epiphanies, like how subjective is right and wrong? What is right, and what is wrong? who determines it? Why should we follow other people's standards of right and wrong? That's just an example, let me get hold of my thoughts and I shall enlighten the world. Did I mention I've suddenly become a narcissist over the weekend? I don't know where I got it from, but I really am wondering how I steered towards that direction.

Just finished cleaning my room (my floor is squeaky clean, yay!) and getting ready for tomorrow's class. Am going to extract my bottom left wisdom tooth this Thursday. Wish me luck that it'll come out as easily as the first one. I want to EAT! And I really hate that constant nagging pain. I wanted to study law before I go to bed, but I really don't feel like opening the book at all. I need spanking. And I think I've finally figured out what I want to do for exercise: Rock climbing. I really liked it, and I really didn't mind the muscle pains, it's really good exercise and thus I don't have to worry about becoming muscular at the wrong places. Problem is, I don't have someone to go with. Anybody?? Night all!

I am Jane with a new resolution

Hence forth from today, I shall not plan anything anymore. Consequential implementation include:

1. If I so happen to wake up one morning and decide to take a bus down to Johor Bahru, then so I shall.
2. If I so happen to be doing my homework and am hit by a sudden urge to go shopping, then shopping I shall go.
3. If I so happen to have the urge to eat something out of the extraordinary like, for example, Chilis, then Chilis I shall have.
4. If I so happen to come back from class and find myself bored to death and suddenly am hit by the boogie waves, then to the clubs I will hit.
5. If I so happen to feel very very down and am hit by the need to drink, then Mr Walker I shall consult.
6. If I so happen to want to do something at a strange point then so shall it be done.
7. If I so happen to want to say something that I know will offend the people around me then so shall it be said. Yeah, right. I know I won't.

The key here is SPONTANEITY. Why all of a sudden you may ask? Let's just say that I've always liked being spontaneity from the beginning and spontaneity has done me well for 18 years of my life. Probably I'm getting old and maybe that's why I wanted to change things. You know, acting 'older', 'wiser', get more 'organized', ditch the surprises and start 'mellowing down', you get my drift. But organization has caused me nothing more than heartache, frustration, pain, and waste of time. So, 'planning' be gone! I'm back to being spontaneous. Because things work just find with me when I'm spontaneous. Suggestions actually get implemented when I do it spontaneously (compared to what people say about things going well when it's well-planned). If you still don't understand, then let me give you a short life-cycle preview of how my planning goes. (bloody blogger, when I enlarge it the words become blur)

So, tell me how to not be angry with the world. I really don't understand. These kind of things only happen to me. Not once, not twice, but EVERY SINGLE FREAKING TIME. Is that luck, coincidence or just pure fact? People like these are like a finger scratching an itchy patch on your skin. At first it feels REALLY nice because it takes away the itch. And then it becomes addictive, and you keep scratching. After awhile, you find part of your epidermis gone, and then the flesh starts feeling raw, and next thing you know it, you've scratched part of your skin off, and it smarts whenever you touch it or sweat. Yes, I find solace in describing such things. I'm sick, I know.
I'm telling your, I shall only concentrate on making myself happy from now on. No need to share my happiness, because the happiness that I am capable of having isn't even enough for me. And so, if I appear selfish, then I have all the reasons to be. Why? Because not only don't I get appreciated, but all my thoughts go to waste, all my time go to waste, and I end up being frustrated. So why should I bother when others don't? I guess being with a loner has made me one as well. I now see the beauty of being ALONE and looking out only for yourself. Why be self-sacrificing when not only the other parties don't know, but make a mockery out of your sacrifice? Might as well let them all rot and go to hell. I don't know why I sacrifice my own happiness for others. They seem to have plenty of it, whereas I am in short supply. So why make the rich richer at my own expense. Bloody pissing off. Go to hell for all I care. Don't know why I take over your banging-head-on-wall burden in order for you to go jollying and then bang MY head on the wall for your burden and make myself frustrated. Although I have them to thank for giving me a reason to write. Just because I get inspired when I'm angry and sad doesn't mean you have to make me angry and sad. And they say I'm sadistic because I laugh when I see balls bursting on television. So, today, I declare that I no longer am bothered by your feelings, unless you are someone who DOES value me. And I officially admit that beau is right when he says "That's why I don't care less. You have enough problems and lack of happiness of your own. Don't need donation from others". So maybe I altered his words. But believe me, what he says is much more straightforward and so, I don't know why I altered them to be less blunt.

On another note, on Tuesday night, the lunatic in beau's house decided to take his lunacy up another notch. He was beating up his girlfriend who had ALREADY broken up with him (this is what I don't understand. You've already broken up with him, LEAVE! Why give him another chance and excuse to beat you?). But this time, she was SCREAMING. Pure sign of enough is enough. And so, somebody called the police, who only arrived after four to five calls, how 'efficient'. Imagine if he really did kill her. Not only would she be ALREADY DEAD, but the other people who DID NOT KILL HER, will be involved to, AND suspected for murder, which obviously isn't fair. After they arrived, knocked on their door, and saw the girl rubbing oil on the obviously angry EX-boyfriend who has the look of a killer in his eyes, they just left without doing anything. The lunatic obviously got angry and so, confronted his housemates who couldn't be bothered with him at all. Imagine feeling hostile in your own home, how sick is that. And so everyone fled. Beau spent the night with me, which he complained afterwards that he should have stayed on (yeah, right). My point still stands that all psychotic abusive boyfriends/husbands/guys in general should have their balls tied with rubber band until they wither and drop of by themselves.
No balls = no testosterones = no violence. Problem solved. PERMANENTLY.
And if you say that it isn't fair since they won't have kids of their own flesh and blood, then I say serve them right. And maybe since these psychos can't have kids, then there would be nobody to carry on their psychotic abusive genes. Thus, less aggressive people in the world, thus less criminals. See, I almost found the solution for world peace. I should be given a Nobel prize.

I need to go to sleep. I'm freaking sick. We both are. And he slept off already! Anyways, the plan to Melaka is STILL on, because it was so hard for me to convince him to go, and I shall spend time with him, his bro (YAY! I'm going to see Sean Kingston, the Malaysian version of course) and whoever so who will meet me without jeopardizing my day. So if you're going to spoil my mood, then PLEASE, just don't see me. I've been frustrated enough. I want my Ais Kacang, his Chicken ball rice, and some heavy duty shopping. And maybe a drink or two after that, and we'll see how it goes. Like I said, I'm done planning. I really am.
p/s: The irony about all this is that I'm PLANNING to NOT PLAN. Isn't that planning also? Shish! I'm going to ditch this getting old thing and be as childish and immature as I wish. Live with it or be gone.

p/p/s : I'm thinking of changing my nickname to Ms. Cheong Hei, since all my blogs are NEVER short, although short to me, is long to a layman.

I am Jane after another year.

This post is about 2 hours late, and hence, I've missed the auspicious date. I guess I should have written it down yesterday night instead. I blame blogger.com because it took me that long to figure out how to edit my previous post, which came out apparently blank because I used black as my font colour.

Okay, so for my purpose, let's all just pretend it's the 7th of July today. Today is the day my beau and I...became official? I really don't know, it's just that we really really liked 07/07/07 so much that we decided to make it a special day. He even made up this thing where he said "We have two anniversaries, one for you, one for me!" You could say that that was the day he first uttered "I love you" to me, although we were fighting at that time because he was so busy playing games with his friend that he totally forgot that he was supposed to meet me at 7pm. Yes, we have an obsession with the number seven, deal with it.

Today also marks the second week of the semester. So far, so good, although I've been NATO (no action, talk only) till now. I REALLY MUST START STUDYING!! Because:

1. I really want to get my law over and done with
2. I have the 'advantage' of having Marcus instead of Kiran for my Audit, I don't like going to class and being screamed at. If I want to get screamed at, all I have to do is pick up the phone and tell my mum what I really did on that day. I'm sure she'll find something to scream about. She screams whenever she's on the phone anyway, makes no difference. So, I really don't need anymore people screaming at me.
3. We really don't know how long Goh Leng Chai is going to stick around until he decides that he is too good to teach just Corporate Governance.
4. If there's one thing I'm good at, it's bullshitting my way through, and since I have the language, I already have an upper hand compared to the rest. Now all I need is the knowledge, that's the hard part. I really don't understand how I can finish a novel in half a day, but am able to quote from it, but really can't put myself down to finishing a stupid text book which is way thinner than some of the novels I've read.
5. I DON'T WANT TO SIT AND STUDY ACCA FOREVER!! Even repeating tax was a bore, hell, by the time I sat for the paper, I could almost regurgitate all the past year answers. It's either I've become THAT good, or I've done it so many times, it's STUCK there. Nevertheless, I shall give myself the benefit of the doubt and THINK I AM that good.
6. With the coming foreseen recession on the way, and the current inflation, it really is a bad time to be a student. Think studying-child=investment=liability. Investments do not go well with recessions. Nobody invests during a recession. I really am not a liability, maybe semi, but then again, my mother does give my brother additional allowance. So I really don't understand why people conveniently label me as the FAMA(Father Mother) scholarship holder, while my brother is the almighty JPA scholarship holder. My scholarship has a name, you know. It's called NST-MAPCU. YES, NST, the newspaper half of Malaysia reads everyday, THAT NST. Even my mother refuses to acknowledge I have a scholarship. Seriously, I have every single right to be angry at them. Who gives you the right to label me the spoilt brat who doesn't appreciate that my parents provide my monthly allowance? It's not like I deliberately wrote in the exam script, "Dear marker, please fail me so that I don't have to go to work soon so that I can continue drying up my parents' finances". Seriously pissed! There are perks of not being a JPA scholar, you know. For one, I'm not bonded to the government. So, yes, I hate those who think highly of JPA scholars because the grass really isn't greener on the other side. And yes, I just proved Peter's point of my preference to fight for the minority. Just because somebody isn't a JPA scholar doesn't mean he or she is worthless. There are so many people who go out to work after school to finance their education THEMSELVES. THAT, I respect. There are people who take loans under their own names and later on work to pay off the loan plus interest THEMSELVES. And there are people who've sent their children to Timbuktu on their own savings who look down on other people's kids who aren't JPA scholars. Also, there are those whose children are bums, but they still insist on spending money on them, and they talk about how other people's children who are not JPA scholars. Seriously, if you don't have the ability, it's really better to shut your pie hole. And while I'm at it, people whose children HAVE already graduated and are fortunate enough to do well do not have the right to decide other people's children's destiny. So your children were lucky enough to enter a multi-national company, enjoy the fortune and shut up about it if you're not willing to share. Don't add to other people's doubts and worries. I really don't see anything great about being a JPA scholar. So you get to go overseas. So you get a miserable allowance which really is INHUMANELY insufficient. So you get the glory, so you get the title and SO you get to meet the prime minister (which I really don't see what the big deal is). SO WHAT? You are bonded to the government for five years, maybe more if you take certain courses. Isn't that like PAYING back your debt? So, I propose we alter the name to JPA loan recipients. Why? Because working with the government, although there is job-security, offers only a miserable salary with very little benefits (forget medical and dental expenses at general hospitals, it takes you forever to finally see the doctor anyway) and since you're BONDED to them, they really don't need to raise your salary to keep you with them. Think of all the lost opportunities which obviously will amount to opportunity costs which is VERY material.
7. I want my own place, I want my privacy, I want the ability to want something because I have the means to, and I want the ability to have what I want by means of my own finances. I want financial freedom, freedom of choice, freedom of speech, I want the freedom to be happy and the freedom to decide my own life. And yes, I want many other things.

It's 3am now, way past my bedtime. I hate morning classes! Well, at least I don't have boring lecturers this semester, or so I think. Wish me luck. Am looking forward to going to Melaka on Friday, so I better get well. Which reminds me, I'M BLOODY BLOODY IRRITATINGLY SICK!!!


HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, BEAU!!! And may witness many more together.

I am Jane's blog. JANE'S blog. Get it?

I had a bunch of stuff I wanted to write about while I was in the LRT. Unfortunately, due to TELEKOM's incompetent staff, it didn't happen. And so all my rubbish went down the drain.
On the other hand, HEM you can't black mail me. I don't care. And you should know that by now. And so I shall continue writing about whatever strikes my mood whenever it comes to me.

Looking forward to Melaka again next Friday. The beau promised. And so, now I have officially put it in black and white, literally.

Speaking of which, since TELEKOM is the cause of my not having anything substantial to write about now, here are some tips on how to get better service. Best works if you're a girl.

1. Some people think that Malaysian's are not independent and often just pick up the phone and call customer service instead of troubleshooting themselves. Well, there are two sides of the coin here. There are people who call customer service EVERY SINGLE TIME they have a problem, although their problem may involve them not plugging the telephone line into the modem. On contrary, there are people who DON'T know what the fuck is wrong with their internet and insist on troubleshooting. The key here is to know your stuff. Before calling customer service, do identify that the problem does not lie on YOUR side so that you don't give these people a chance to ridicule you.
2. After going through the never-ending hold session which I think is a scam just to make you pay a higher telephone bill, simply tell the operator what you have done to troubleshoot your very bad connection which 9/10 times is due to their fault in order to save your time and your telephone bill from shooting sky high because this people think you're a complete idiot.
3. If they finally find out that there is some imaginary port/ cable problem which they can't fix and have to send a technician over, make some noise and tell them it's NOT your first time because it obviously isn't. And then, make SOME MORE noise about how you're paying your internet bill for nothing since you can't use it. Sometimes, surprisingly after this, your internet will work.
4. If it still does not work, and they tell you that they need three working days for a technician to fix it, trust me when I say three working days equals two weeks, TELEKOM-time. And so, you should continue making more noise about how you had to wait two weeks before a real-live technician came and did anything. If the person says that it is the protocol, then ask her if it's okay if you pay your bill three working days later since it's YOUR protocol and ask for her name so that you can put it on her tab.
   
5. Your technician will be at your doorstep early the next morning after this. If he isn't, then call TELEKOM again, and let all hell break lose.

The essence to getting Malaysians to get things done is by raising your voice. That, I have learnt. Sometimes, even a little blackmail and sarcasm works just as well, in that case you wouldn't have to resolve to screaming.

Speaking of screaming, I do not understand girls who stick around guys who abuse them. I say that guys with temper problems should have their dicks cut off since their testosterone levels are too high. I don't want to write about him right now since he's my beau's housemate and he really is terrorizing everybody else in the house. The fucker really should do something bout his temper. Throwing your girlfriend around DOES NOT count as anger management and is under no circumstances, intolerable. People like that should have their balls tied up with a rubber band so that no blood circulation goes there and let them see the balls just wither and DROP OFF.

On another note, the dreadful semester has started. I went to college to register for my resit paper, only to be told that I can only register a resit subject in August. Later on, she told me that I could register for the paper, but I would have to pay for the full fees (which was what I already did and told her). And then she sent me to some very extremely long queue just to pass up a shit of paper which didn't take me 5 seconds to fill. I was so pissed I just went home and decided to resit Law only starting August. Again, Malaysian incompetency. And we dream of Wawasan 2020 and what not. Sending our astronaut into outer space AGAIN, as if the last one wasn't enough. Seriously, what's there to see? I mean, I'm sure there's no secret hide out built around a lagoon with beautiful topless mermaids bask in the moon and star light everyday right? Unless our dear 'grandfathers'(translated into Malay) sent this guy up to hide their secret stash of cash.

Speaking of the ongoing recession-like scenario in our dear Malaysia, I once read this article that Malaysian government did not monetarily subsidize our fuel prices for us. The reason given was because our government is the main exporter for high quality oil of which is sold to us, only at a lower price than sold overseas and thus, the subsidy. I am not very fond of our administrative system, but I do know that our oil is sold to other countries at a much higher price because of its quality. And the petrol we use is of a lower quality which comes from the middle east. Thus, the writer of the article does have his point although he did get it confused. I'm guessing that the profit we make from selling our oil is used to import lower quality petrol, which is then sold to us, at a price obviously LOWER than what is sold to the other countries and hence, the so-called SUBSIDY. Although the financial reports given by Petronas who CLAIM that they are loss-making rather than gaining profits at the height of our oil crisis is, however, questionable, since most of their employees say otherwise.

And so, what the newspapers have forgotten to highlight is that although price of fuel, food and other essentials are going up, our parents' salaries are not going anywhere (except for the miserable RM625 so-called petrol subsidy which comes up to about only RM56 a month. But then again, it is called a SUBSIDY, and not free petrol). However, some of our allowance are going DOWN. And so I guess, the rich gets richer, the poor gets poorer, our parents have to balance their own spending with ours, and we get dragged along. I am not complaining, but it IS horrible to be a student during this economical period.

I'm too hungry. I'm off to eat. And the internet better be working when I get back or I'll be really pissed.

p/s: Do know that rubbish is not utter rubbish except that provoked by other's stupidity.