I am Jane, Low Behold

Do you know what happens when you feel down? I'm not talking about rage here. I'm talking about disappointment, sadness, disbelief.
You feel numb to the world, it's as if your instincts are trying to protect you from getting hurt further.
You don't know what is spinning around you.
You honestly don't really care.
Your heart rate slows down significantly.
It feels as if it's threatening to stop any minute now if you don't pay attention.
You feel it pulsating against your rib cage, through your bones, through the tissue, through your skin, all the way to the outermost layer of your being.
You feel as if it radiates this moody aura around you.
Perhaps only animals will be able to sense it.
But it is possible to hide it from other human beings.
You feel so numb to the outside world, yet so cautious about your own self.
All you want to do, is to curl up somewhere,
in bed, in a corner.
In the dark.
Absorbing in the ambience, and all the darkness that surrounds you.
Hoping that you'd forget this feeling before it subsumes you.

Jane is feeling ridiculous. But she's definitely feeling herself. Sense that big changes are coming, decided for the betterment of two parties, good or bad, only time will tell.