I am Jane in need of Narcissism

It hurts..

it hurts so bad.

I need to practise what I preach.

I need to love myself.

I need to be happy so that I can be happy.

I need to learn that I can still be happy even when others are not.

I need to learn that I don't need to make everyone happy just so I will feel happy

because then I will never be happy

because everyone will never be happy all at the same time.

There will always be someone to please

someone who will need my help

someone who will want me to do something.

I need to live for myself.

Sasha is right.

I said it myself.

One can only feel hurt because one has let the other party hurt one.

I've done it before.

But why does it feel so hard to do now?

I am back where I started.

I feel even worse.

I feel betrayed.

I know its not my place.

But I'm starting to get sick of it.

I want to live in my own world.

I think I'm abnormal because I can't seem to get along with anyone.

Not for a long time.

Please explain to me this price that I have to pay.

What is it for?

It hurts so badly.

It hurts so badly that it has accummulated.

IT FUCKING HURTS.

I just want to stop hurting.

I want this all to stop.

I need to know that no one will understand me.

Most importantly,

I need to know that it's perfectly fine.